Ulla

Ulla

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Wearing your hat backwards is against company policy.

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For breakfast we’re serving Cheerios, or as I like to call them, tasteless oat circles.

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I’m so glad they finally passed that law banning loud things.

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I always call local news stations to let them know how I’m doing.

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Yes, putting your finger in someone’s belly button counts as sex, and yes, you can definitely get pregnant by doing it.

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Don’t try anything funny, I’ve got boobs in the back of my head.

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My father used to be very close friends with the son of the inventor of farina.

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There’s a big gathering happening right now in my hallway.

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It’s official: After centuries of controversy, looking directly into the sun is now being considered a sport.

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The seventies were the best because none of the nineties kids were born yet.

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You would be so much cooler if your name was Rutabaga.

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I wish there was a word for those really long sandwiches they sell at Subway. It’s so annoying having to type out, “really long sandwiches they sell at Subway” all the time.

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I almost learned how to ride a bike.

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Pepsi Presents: Mount Rushmore

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My favourite song is that one they play in the background of eHarmony commercials.

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